How do you know when you're in love? So this is what all the hype’s about! I was glowing. I was infatuated. I was walking on air. I was more alive than ever. At 28, I was helplessly, hopelessly falling in love for the very first time. Sure, I had had my fair share of teen and twenty-something crushes up to that point, but those were nothing like this.

With the man of my dreams equally smitten, I was suddenly finding myself in the throes of one of the most exhilarating, significant and emotionally intense experiences of my life. If you’re lucky, you can relate.

Often likened to having a mental illness or drug dependency, romantic love is in many cases unplanned, inconvenient, involuntary and seemingly absurd.

In trying to make sense of the seemingly uncontrollable, the Romans believed that Cupid, the naughty angel, randomly shot his arrow at unsuspecting victims. The little bugger had gotten me all right, unexpectedly impacting my focus in the midst of my pursuit of a doctorate.

Deliciously delirious with love’s intoxicating effects, I realized that this temporary state of insanity was actually invaluable in my sexuality studies. I could finally fully respond to a question often asked by my students and Web site visitors: How do you know when you’re truly falling in love?

It's a question that is probably on the minds of many people with Valentine's Day just days away.

As brilliantly described in Dr. Helen Fisher’s “Why We Love,” here's how you know when you’re love-struck:

You’re suddenly shy, at least initially. Even the most confident can feel timid, anxious, awkward, and even fearful around a crush. You may turn pale, flush, tremble, stammer, sweat, feel dizzy, breathe faster, get weak in the knees and have “butterflies in your stomach.” While such symptoms are flu-like, you’ve been struck with no more than a love bug.

You’re suddenly manic. You may have lost your appetite or find yourself sleepless, yet feeling totally energized, even hyperactive. Know that you have your brain to blame. Elevated concentrations of dopamine, and its chemical derivative norepinephrine, are basically hijacking your brain, lowering your serotonin levels. These neuron-transmitters, known as monoamines, are what make us feel loopy with love.

You’re obsessed. Your “love object” has taken on what psychologists call a “special meaning.” This sweetie has become unique, novel, and all-important — the center of your universe. You are infatuated, focusing your energy and passion on every little thing associated with your honey.

Elevated levels of dopamine in your brain make for more focused attention and motivation in directing and attaining your amour goals. You are consumed with “intrusive thinking,” fantasizing and daydreaming constantly about your beloved. One survey found that the love-obsessed reported thinking of their beloved for more than 85 percent of their waking hours. Not surprisingly, couples can describe how they fell in love with each other years later.

You’ve changed. You may find that you’re revamping yourself. Between your clothing style, mannerisms, habits, and even values, you’re willing to do almost anything and everything to win your loved one’s affections.

You’re on the ride of your life. Until the relationship offers security, you may feel like you’re on a roller coaster. When things are good, you’re on “cloud 9.” But if a loved one is unresponsive right away, indicates something negative, seems indifferent ... basically, does anything to rattle you, you may feel despair, depressed, rage, mopey and listless until the situation is resolved. In Fisher’s survey, 79 percent of men and 83 percent of women reported dissecting an adored one’s actions.

You’re sporting rose-colored glasses these days. Passion makes for perfect. While the love-struck can name faults their love object has, unlike the rest of us, they see these defects as charming and endearing. Love is blind. And you are willing to go to great lengths to make sure that the illusion you’ve created remains unscathed.

You have no desire for anyone else. You want sexual and emotional union with your one and only. Yet while lust — the craving for sexual gratification — is a major player in your passion pursuits — the desire for sex and monogamy are less important than the desire for an emotional union. Men and women ache to have their love returned more than anything.

Believe it or not, it seems that Mother Nature wanted to bestow all of the aforementioned on us during the attraction stage of coupledom. Lust is said to have evolved to motivate humans to seek sexual relations with almost any semi-appropriate partner. Romantic love, however, helps us to focus our mating attention on a specific person, helping us to conserve our energy and time with one courtship. Feelings of attachment, and its components of peace, calm and security, then take over for the long haul. With many arguing that this passionate state of affairs lasts no more than two years, be sure to enjoy this love drug while it lasts!

In the Know, Sex News …

— Government promotes sexual well-being. Britain’s NHS has added “sexercise” as a means to better health. With the NHS Direct Web site citing a lowered risk of heart attack and longer life span as incentives, one has to wonder which other governments will follow suit.

— Unimpressive efforts in Illinois. An article in Obstetrics & Gynecology has found that nearly one in three sex education teachers in Illinois public schools are not trained for such instruction. Furthermore, the state’s school-based sex education focused the most attention on HIV/AIDS, STDs, and abstinence-until-marriage. The least frequently taught topics included emergency contraception, sexual orientation, and condoms and other contraceptives.

— African youth need information. According to the African Journal of Reproductive Health, new survey data on 12- to 14-year-olds in Burkina Faso, Ghana, Malawi, and


Uganda found that they are already sexually active. While the youth were aware of pregnancy and HIV, the youth had little in-depth knowledge about either. Researchers are recommending school-based sex education as a promising avenue for equipping young people with the information they need.

Click here to visit the FOXSexpert section

Dr. Yvonne Kristín Fulbright is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc. She is the author of several books including, "Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots."

Source: APThu Dec 09, 2010, 12:43 pm EST Comments Buzz up!



LEWIS RUN, Pa. - Actor Wesley Snipes began serving a three-year sentence at a federal prison in Pennsylvania on Thursday for failure to file income tax returns.

Snipes, 48, arrived shortly before noon at the Federal Correctional Institution McKean in the tiny northwestern Pennsylvania town of Lewis Run, federal prisons spokesman Ed Ross said. He had been ordered to surrender by noon.

The minimum security prison camp is worlds away from the harsh prison fortresses depicted in the Snipes' films "Undisputed" and "Brooklyn's Finest." The minimum-security camp doesn't have fences around its perimeter.

The 300 nonviolent inmates live in barracks that feature two-man rooms, daily showers and double-feature movie showings Friday through Sunday. Alas, no NC-17, R or X ratings allowed, which knocks out much of Snipes' action-heavy repertoire.

The most jarring aspect of the celebrity's stay might be the five daily head counts, three during the overnight hours. And Snipes, who earned a reported $13 million for the "Blade: Trinity" sequel, will have to adjust to earning just pennies an hour handling kitchen, laundry or other campus chores. He can spend just $290 a month at the prison commissary.

Snipes has appeared in dozens of studio films, from "White Men Can't Jump" and "Demolition Man" in the early 1990s to the blockbuster Blade trilogy.

None of which will score him any points at McKean, officials insist.

"We recognize that he is high profile, but we treat all our inmates the same," spokeswoman Shirley White told The Associated Press last week.

According to U.S. prosecutors, the actor failed to file any tax returns for at least a decade, and owed $2.7 million in taxes on $13.8 million in income from 1999 to 2001 alone.

Snipes, a dues-paying member of a tax-protest group that challenges the government's right to collect taxes, described himself at his 2008 sentencing as a naive truth-seeker.

"I am an idealistic, naive, passionate, truth-seeking, spiritually motivated artist, unschooled in the science of law and finance," said Snipes, who had pursued theater and dance from an early age, attending the vaunted High School for the Performing Arts in New York City.

Tuesday night, he told CNN's "Larry King Live" that he was not nervous about reporting to prison.

Star of the "Blade" trilogy, Snipes was convicted in 2008 on three misdemeanor counts of willful failure to file income tax returns.

On Wednesday, he made a last-minute request for a new trial, but on Thursday a judge in Florida rejected the emergency motion. Snipes had argued said that a judge erred by not allowing defense attorneys to interview jurors about misconduct allegations, but U.S. District Judge William Terrell Hodges said the motion merely re-argues issues that have already been decided.

At McKean, he can pursue his spirituality at weekly meetings of nearly any religious group imaginable, from Wiccans to Jehovah's Witnesses to Spanish-speaking Evangelical Catholics.

The martial-arts enthusiast can get his exercise playing sand volleyball or indoor basketball, or work out on an elliptical machine or stair climber. And he can tap into his fun side through badminton, bocci or bridge.

Should he pull a muscle in a pickup game, the infirmary copay is just $2.

But it's not all fun and games.

The daily wake-up call is at 6:35 a.m. The mundane jobs run seven hours a day. There's little fashion flair to the prison-issued khakis. And contact in the visitors room is limited to "a kiss," according to the prison handbook.

Snipes has tried to delay his arrival while he takes his appeal to the U.S. Supreme Court. But the trial judge said he had gotten a fair trial.

Hodges saw in Snipes "a history of contempt" for U.S. tax laws, the judge said at sentencing.

Never mind that the actor, changing course, had delivered $5 million in checks to the IRS that day. Hodges imposed consecutive one-year terms for the three misdemeanor convictions.

"Someday, every fighter loses," says the prison boxer Monroe Hutchens, played by Snipes, in 2002's "Undisputed." "In the end, everybody gets beaten. The most you can hope for is that you stay on top a while."

(Celebrity News)

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MySpace Melts Down With Music

The opportunity for anyone to be noticed and the chance to listen to something other than what the radio plays: this is the influence the Internet has had on today's music industry.

"With social networking, we're able to get people to listen to a larger spectrum of the musical genres that are available today," said junior psychology major Dave Burgman.

Burgman is just one of millions of musicians that depend on the popularity of social networking sites to promote their music to a wider audience.

Writing, recording and promoting are three of the most vital steps to success in the music industry according to Newburgh, N.Y. based pop-punk band "With The Punches."

For years, the social media website Myspace.com was a key method of promoting a band.  

            "It's easy to personalize it to your band," said "With The Punches" guitarist and vocalist Dustin Wallace in a phone interview.

With the growing popularity of Facebook, artists now must find new ways of popularizing their music for a larger audience.

            Myspace.com commanded the attention of teenagers worldwide in 2003.  The site was a new way to connect with friends, meet new people and create unique, personal profiles for users to share with the world.

            Social networking had not yet reached such a high point as the site did with the Myspace movement, as it quickly became a social media giant.

            Best of all, Myspace was a breeding ground for music. For the first time, unsigned artists were able to upload their music and reach a wider audience.

            In this time, Myspace was not the only rapidly growing social network. After a few years, a site called Facebook rose to popularity.

            As Facebook expanded, Myspace users began to switch to the new service. In 2009, the monthly number of Facebook vistors surpassed the monthly Myspace visitors, according to web measurement service comScore. Now, Facebook claims nearly 100 million more users than Myspace overall.  

            Burgman's Pittsburgh-based band, "Colors," was formed last September. He joined the band in February of this year. "Colors" is a hardcore, metal and pop band, and those are just three of the literally thousands of genres that are available at the click of a mouse using the Internet.

            "For our image, Myspace is the best. We can set up a whole page dedicated to [what]we are all about," Burgman said.

            While Myspace may still be the best tool for music promotion, Facebook seems to be the best way to get recognized.

            "There's less important people on Myspace these days, [and]there's more spam," Burgman said.

            While the website boasts 100 million plus users, the number of active users is probably much less. In a report by Jeff Bercovici for DailyFinance.com, it was said that in Feb. 2010, Myspace had about 18 million active users, a six percent decline from the previous month's figures.

            "Facebook gets a lot more exposure, but they don't hear our music," Burgman said.

            Many artists have encountered similar problems with Facebook. Mypsace features a music player on a band's profile, but Facebook lacks that capability. Facebook's music player is located under a different tab of the profile, and not all bands use this feature.

"With The Punches" has faced this issue, too.

            "We didn't open a Facebook for the band until a year ago," Wallace said. "It's a little less user-friendly for music stuff."

            A newer problem is that as Facebook grows in popularity, active Myspace users decline significantly.

            "As more and more people seem to be moving away from their personal Myspace pages, we knew we would have to branch out," Wallace said.

            Facebook may not be Myspace's only competitor in the near future.

            "2010 was [kind of] the year of Twitter, and it has taken over more than Facebook and Myspace in our case," said "With the Punches" vocalist Jesse Vadala.

            Regardless of trends, social media seems it will continue to play a major role in music exposure.

            "If I didn't have a Myspace or Facebook for my band, I wouldn't be anywhere today," said Burgman. "It's really interesting that I can put up a song it took me two hours to record, promote it a little online and then when I see people, they'll know who I am and what I've done."

            "One of the best things about doing this is how many friends we've made all over the U.S. […] via social networking, […] instant messaging and how many we've made on the Internet," Wallace said. Also one more site to watch out for as time go by is Celebrities Say Hello. This company promotes unsigned top Artists. Artists like Clip, Martin, RP9, with there new Videos Site      and online radio community this will be one company to watch. But you need to move fast there are only looking for 1000 Artist to help with there promotion.